37 weeks - Update #7 - November 29th, 2024
As of Sunday, December 1st, I will be 37 weeks pregnant! Alyosha is measuring a steady 4 weeks behind that, currently at nearly 33 weeks.
I think now comes a window of time between all the advocating we have done for Alyosha - working on his birth plan, getting to know our doctors, arranging for every possible situation. And now we wait. There is nothing else we can do - we have to face whatever comes, knowing God is in control - and we aren’t!
For me, Lily, I find myself feeling guilt - did I have enough time to let this baby grow to the size he needs to be? Should he have stayed in all the way to 40 weeks? What if, what if, what if…. The questions go on and on. It is choosing to believe that this has purpose and design right when every fiber of your being is telling you to doubt. That is the hardest part.
Did we fail him? We can’t possibly have prepared enough, we begin to think. The unknowns become all we want to know about. But then, our Redeemer lives! These things aren’t something we can understand this side of heaven.
Job 19:25-27 (NIV):
“I know that my redeemer lives, and that in the end he will stand on the earth. And after my skin has been destroyed, yet in my flesh I will see God; I myself will see him, with my own eyes - I and not another. How my heart yearns within me!”
None of this was planned by us, and yet we were given one path, set out before us, which we would either accept or deny. And Alyosha is given only one life. No matter how long or short, it is his life that is created and given which is so precious. In all of the questions and wrestling, Chris and I keep coming back to just how incredible it is that Alyosha is here with us, he has made it so far and he is so strong. We are going to celebrate his birthday with no shadow of fear and doubt, knowing our Redeemer lives, and will carry us, and Alyosha, through every part of this difficult road.
These are the things Chris and I carry in our hearts.
We found out yesterday, Alyosha will be born in Saskatoon. This decision was the result of much deliberation between Saskatoon and Edmonton - ultimately it was not a decision Chris and I had to make. After the big meeting with all the doctors this week, it was determined that to needlessly bring Alyosha to be born in a far away place, when we cannot predict how he will be doing once he is born, would not be the best course of action. Instead, it is now the plan to get Alyosha stable in Saskatoon, and once this has been done, determine where his myelo surgery needs to happen based off of how he is doing. There is confidence it can be done in Saskatoon, unless other complications come up with his heart, in which case Edmonton will be involved in making a path forward to get the surgery done there.
These are not the answers we had expected, but it is also not an absolute NO - which is a huge answer to prayer! These doctors are making the case that you cannot plan interventions for a baby that you cannot see - how accurate. Chris and I have been arguing and advocating for this since the very beginning - please do not remove the possibility that we have missing pieces! As I had previously mentioned, our neurosurgeon in Saskatoon will provide the surgery as soon as we know he will be suited to have this operation there. There will be an anesthesia consult with us once he is born and we can make assessments of how he will tolerate this. All of this news is so welcome, we are just so happy to have multiple hospitals working together to make sure this little boy gets what he needs.
There is still much to be determined, things you can be praying for. There are unknowns in relationship to Alyosha’s digestive system - I have extra fluid, and he also has had a small stomach in some ultrasounds - indications that he may not have things connected properly somewhere in his esophagus or intestines. Our doctors told us we could not operate if this was the case and this part of our conversation was very hard. My fear is that our little boy needs to get food into his tummy - this is our bottom line. Please keep this in your prayers - whether or not he has any of these issues, that our doctors would be open to providing the necessary care so that he does not have any issues with eating.
Of course, we had to discuss what we will do if we only have minutes or hours with Alyosha. This was also very hard. We are so thankful to have family and friends who we will draw near if this happens. In this regard, there is no planning we need to do, we will just treasure every moment with Alyosha if this is the case.
We are thankful that we will be in good hands and our doctors will be constantly coming and getting more information to us and ensuring our wishes are followed for Alyosha’s care. Our appointment yesterday (nov 28) was definitely a glimpse into almost every scenario we might face following Alyosha’s birth. But as I have said, now we wait.
Alyosha’s delivery is still set for December 3rd. We ask that our family reach out to our community if and when it is possible to do visits with Alyosha. We anticipate first ensuring he meets his grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. We will make sure to provide you an opportunity to see him when we have a greater sense of how much time we have.
Here are some things we want to raise as prayer requests, but also blessings!
Alyosha’s care team - that many tender hearts would surround him and care for him as they would their own baby. This is especially hard for me (Lily) as I will be in recovery and will not be able to be with him right away. Pray for Chris while Alyosha is being brought to the NICU - that he feels supported and is able to make the decisions he needs to for Alyosha.
Our supports - our parents, siblings and closest friends - this is a hard experience for them and we need to lift them up in prayer as they will be juggling all of the uncertainty along with us.
Thanksgiving - we are overwhelmed with the generosity of our community - we have had many people pour out blessings on us through financial support. We are so grateful, and overwhelmed with your kindness. We are carefully stewarding what has been given. Thank you.
Unity between Chris and I - we are so thankful to those of you praying over our marriage. We knew this experience would bring about many challenges in our marriage - and it is not easy, but we have seen God bring us closer together now than we ever have been. We see ourselves daily being aware of how we need to include one another in each choice we make for Alyosha. We choose never to isolate ourselves and have been learning more and more how to be a good team. Praise God!
Financial Update:
Chris and Lily continue to seek support for their time in Saskatoon. We are so appreciative of what has already been given, and ask that you give only according to your means. We will continue to do our best to inform you on ways that Chris and Lily can be supported as we know more about their long term situation.
As stated in previous updates, Chris and Lily will not be working for part, if not all of December. Lily has now secured maternity leave, and Chris will be able to receive benefits once Alyosha is born. However, this still leaves a financial concern for covering costs of utilities and home payments which will be a greater burden with their income being significantly lowered, on top of the costs of food and gas to drive to Saskatoon. They are currently establishing what their living accommodations will look like, but are confident this should come at a low expense, if any. Aside from this, the main concern will be the costs of special equipment and purchases to support Alyosha once he comes home.
As we have previously noted, Chris and Lily have an account available to send e-transfer to. This is their preferred method of receiving financial support, as it allows them to allocate funds where it is needed most. If you would like to aid them financially, you can etransfer to babywiebe2024@gmail.com.
Getting others connected:
We will be doing updates on a weekly basis now that things are picking up so quickly. We encourage you to invite others to follow along with Alyosha’s story, because we feel it impressed on our hearts that God will use his life to impact people in ways we cannot imagine and will establish a testimony that lives even after he has gone to heaven to be with Jesus. Please do not hesitate to send an email to babywiebe2024@gmail.com to let us know you want to be on the email list. You can also share the link to the blog. Thank you all for your incredible support. We feel so very loved and upheld by you, in prayer, hugs and encouragement. God's blessings to you.